PROBLEMS IN THE FAMILY
“It seems like we’re always
fighting – but nothing ever gets settled.”
“The kids are getting into trouble
all the time these days”
“We never talk to each other”
“She never wants to have sex”
“He drinks too much”
Chances are you have heard these comments
before – if not in your own home, then in someone else’s.
Such comments usually mean that something is wrong –
that things aren’t going as well as someone would like.
In some cases the problems are temporary;
in others, they have been building for a long time and now
pose a threat to the family.
When things go wrong in the family, most of
us do something that’s very natural: we blame everyone
else. Whether we blame others out loud or keep it entirely
to ourselves, blaming family members never helps. And it usually
hurts – a lot.
What can be done about my family problems?
If a family is basically sound and the problems
have not built up over a long time, most families can usually
solve their problems on their own. But sometimes, for various
reasons, families are unable to resolve their own differences
on their own. They need the help of a professional counselor.
Just by reassuring family members, a counselor can sometimes
relieve a great deal of worry.
But is it serious enough to bother
anyone?
It is much better to work on the little problems
before they become big ones. So the short answer is a resounding
yes. If you take care of things now, you might save yourself
and your family a great difficulty later on.
How can a professional counselor help?
• A counselor can help you and your
family get some perspective on your problems. An outside observer’s
impartial viewpoint goes a long way toward resolving family
and marital conflict.
• A counselor can help you work through important issues.
Disagreements are discussed objectively and are often settled.
• A counselor can teach you and your family the skills
you need to help solve your own problems in the future. Such
skills include, how to listen carefully to each other, how
to talk respectfully to each other, how to debate fairly and
how to compromise and cooperate.
How do I know if I need professional
help?
If you or someone close to you has a personal
problem that affects several areas of your life, it may be
time to get professional help. Contact your assistance program,
local crisis line, mental health clinic or community resource
center. One of them can help you decide what’s best
for you and your family.
Remember
your Employee Assistance Program is:
• Confidential: All information is kept strictly
between you and your counselor
• Informal: A simple phone call starts the
process and there’s no red tape.
For
assistance call Hidalgo Health Associates at:
800-448-4470
Used with permission © 1987, 1996 by Hazelden Foundation,
Revised 1996. All rights reserved. For more information about
the Hazelden Foundation please visit: http://www.hazelden.org
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